''//^^I was nothing before, so I couldn't have asked to be born
I'll be nothing again, so what am I between now and then?
Is there nothing to fear? 'Cause shit's getting weird
So to God who made this man
You better have one hell of a plan
- Love, Me Normally, Will Wood
^^//''
A good old evening, ain't it, hmm? A day before a a nifty recognized oldy some sorta of festival! They say it celebrates "Zoltan gender equity"! Meh, all those insititions keep making up ways to normalize regular gift giving, which is so truly unnecesarry, rightey? Still, a regural gift giving ruotine cant be all grand and big... so all bets on tomoroww for all personalized stuff that's on sehculed transfer! Ferl would especially like that i found him a book of that weird smelly nihilist dude who blabber's about religious trauma! But is it weird its the first year i spend not with him or Rue, but with a soul i dont quite know for long, yet... well, theyre clearly and profoundly ownie! Here they were, muching on some leafs and worms, omnivore much!)
Their purely black presence almost fades into the increasing blackness, as we huddle near that lake i love precisely cause it's perfectly paralell to the hardware store. And as i fidgeted with that little earring on my ear, surely nothing can cut through that oh so calm and not at all underwhelming silen...
-"//If i could leave all and everyone at every possible time.... Then why me and not anybody or anything else?//"
[[And i quickly, cartoonishly bounced up, mildly shifitng in form, thinking]]
[[And i uncherastically froze in space, like a штанина caught near a sezrian war mech, thinking]]
[[And i instictually smiled warmly like im seemingly unaware, thinking]]"god, that's..... unusually deep.... crap, never thought, never thought! All so magnetic and energtic and pathetic to think about.... truth, charm, or sheer non-ownie.... pretending it isn't heard? or WHAT?"
[[and in the end i said "That's true.... but if you think about it, all is finite. And well, isn't the time being finite and death impending what makes it at all i-i-improtant? Like just guessing, that's what Ferl said, but it is somewthing like that???"]]
[[and in the end i said "OHHHH WELLLL... LISTEN, EMM, I DONT LIKE THAT NOTION, LIKE I JUST L-LIKE SPENDING TIME WITH YOU AND IT'S USELESS TO WORRY AND WELL ITS ALL.... YOU JUST MATTER!"]]
[[and in the end i said 'heh, well... sorry, didn't get it much!"]]"god, that's..... unusually deep.... crap, never thought, never thought! Ohh im all scaredy-paralized and visibly shaken, god.... truth, charm, or sheer non-ownie.... pretending it isn't heard? or WHAT?"
[[and in the end i said "That's true.... but if you think about it, all is finite. And well, isn't the time being finite and death impending what makes it at all i-i-improtant? Like just guessing, that's what Ferl said, but it is somewthing like that???"]]
[[and in the end i said "OHHHH WELLLL... LISTEN, EMM, I DONT LIKE THAT NOTION, LIKE I JUST L-LIKE SPENDING TIME WITH YOU AND IT'S USELESS TO WORRY AND WELL ITS ALL.... YOU JUST MATTER!"]]
[[and in the end i said 'heh, well... sorry, didn't get it much!"]]
"god, that's..... unusually deep.... crap, never thought, never thought! And still clinging to learned ways to eb as lovable as i can.... truth, charm, or sheer non-ownie.... pretending it isn't heard? or WHAT?"
[[and in the end i said "That's true.... but if you think about it, all is finite. And well, isn't the time being finite and death impending what makes it at all i-i-improtant? Like just guessing, that's what Ferl said, but it is somewthing like that???"]]
[[and in the end i said "OHHHH WELLLL... LISTEN, EMM, I DONT LIKE THAT NOTION, LIKE I JUST L-LIKE SPENDING TIME WITH YOU AND IT'S USELESS TO WORRY AND WELL ITS ALL.... YOU JUST MATTER!"]]
[[and in the end i said 'heh, well... sorry, didn't get it much!"]]-"It is.... thanks. Very honest, though i wonder what time is beyond a conveyor belt...."
-"Maybe your species never really thought about it in a sacricty way?"
-"I mean in a small community time isnt a number and more so something else. I doubt life will ever seem inifinite after.... corosion"
-"Yeah... yeah.... :("
Phew?
-"You did.... but it's arlight!"
Damn....
-"very Werly of you. All 3 are very good reasons. Just dont stress...."
-"I dont.... sorry!"
-"It was actually sweet"
Phew?